Confession: I’m an Airbnb Host Who Hates to Stay in Airbnbs

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True Life: I’m an Airbnb Superhost who never, ever likes to stay in Airbnbs.

BOOM.

Needless to say, this is a fact that we leave off our Airbnb host profile. And I mean way off. But the truth is, there are few things in the world that I love more than a luxe hotel, and even the sweetest, most well-laid-out Airbnb can’t make me change my mind.

Travis Dove, The Durham Hotel

My husband and I have been renting out our tiny guest house on Airbnb for the past two years, and we absolutely love it. We’ve tricked out the space the best we can — we have a washer/dryer, a full kitchen, a big, comfy bed, a stocked fridge, fluffy towels and even free laundry bags for each guest. We’ve met amazing people, are usually fully booked and pay off a good chunk of our mortgage with the proceeds each month. I’ve tried to make the space feel stylish but also homey. Which is, I suppose, my main problem with other host’s Airbnbs; I don’t want homey on my vacay, otherwise, I’d just stay home.

I also don’t want to open a drawer and see someone else’s socks or look in the refrigerator and find a half-eaten salami. This is the sort of stuff that never happens to you at a hotel. For me, hotels are one of the most magical places on Earth. No matter where I am in the world, as long as I’m staying in a nice hotel, I can promise you I’m going to have a really good time.

Everything has a place.

Here’s the hotel we stayed in recently in Mexico, Casa 1810. It looks low-key from the outside, but trust me — on the inside, it was heavenly. I think one of the things I love best about hotels is that there is always a place for absolutely everything. Got some luggage? There’s a luggage rack. There are drawers for your clothes, hangers for your coats and you don’t have to limit yourself to a tiny corner of the closet like you might in an Airbnb. Is there room on the bathroom counter for all of your skincare products and makeup at a hotel? Check! A plug in the lamp on the bedside table for you to charge your phone? Yup! Whatever you’ve brought with you, there’s a spot to put it in a hotel room, and this fact makes me absolutely giddy.

A housekeeper every day? Yes, please.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t have a housekeeper that comes to my house every day. At a hotel you do, though. At some hotels, a housekeeper comes to your room twice a day! I mean, what sort of fantasyland is this? My husband loves it, too. Needless to say, no one has ever called me a neat freak. Do I need to have someone turn down my blanket and leave me a little chocolate on my bed? Definitely not. But it’s pretty damn nice when it happens. Tip: Always remember to tip your hotel room housekeepers well. They work hard to make your vacation fantastic, and they deserve some extra love.

Room service is fun!

Here’s a pic of my husband Greg and I right after we decided to stay in one night on our vacay and just order room service. When you can start getting room service at an Airbnb, give me a call. But until then, I’ll be in my hotel room eating a cheeseburger under a shiny, silver dome. Oh, and don’t forget about those tiny, single-serve ketchup bottles and mini salt and pepper shakers. For me, room service is more fun than going to Disneyland.

I really like bathrobes.

Zulman

We actually offered two Frette bathrobes at our Airbnb in the early days, but I ditched them after a while, as the laundry just got to be too overwhelming. Most Airbnb hosts don’t even consider offering robes, and now I get why. But what’s a girl like me, who loves robes, supposed to do? GO TO A DAMN HOTEL, THAT’S WHAT.

I totally get the appeal of staying in an Airbnb, though. Depending on your budget, the size of your group or the special needs of your family, it can be a great, practical option. In fact, selfishly, I hope everyone reading this agrees because we want to keep our guest house booked as much as we can. But for me, going on vacation means doing the opposite of whatever is most practical. In a hotel, I can live out my full-on fantasy life and pretend like chocolates on my pillow and Kiehl’s shampoo is completely normal. A little fridge with delicious snacks and 14 fluffy, cloud-like washcloths in the bathroom ain’t no big thang. I know it’s the land of make-believe, but I’m totally OK with that.